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Faulting Others

Some people start to blame or to fault everyone around in the event that bad things happen. While faulting others has become a common habit, there is not common reason behind it. There are many different reasons that make a person blame others. Understanding these reasons can help you deal with people who fault others or break your own habit of this if you are one of these people.  What Are the Reasons Behind the Habit of Faulting Others?  •    Loss of Control – Some people who lose control of a situation panic and try to restore their sense of control over the situation by faulting others. Fear can be behind the act of blaming others.   •    To Control Other People – Some people who want to control others start by blaming them to make them feel that they have done bad things. If someone wants you do something on their behalf, they might blame you for changing your attitude or behavior. They will label you selfish, a snob, or arrogant. This is one of the common methods used by your friends to control you using blame.   •    Refusing to Admit Responsibility – Some people cannot admit mistakes and failures, so they fault others to take responsibility for their actions. One common example is when you say that you were late to work because of traffic, while you could have avoided the traffic jam if you woke up earlier.   •    Unwilling to Accept the Situation – Faulting others is common to people who cannot accept the things that have had happened to them. If they have learned how to accept events properly, faulting others will not happen.   It’s Time to Stop the Habit of Faulting Others  If you have the habit of faulting others, you can stop that habit through these tips.   Look for the Cause of the Problem  When things don’t work out the way they should, it’s easy to be creative and find reasons to blame others. To avoid this, you need to learn to relax without thinking about why that situation happened. Tolerate uncertainty for a moment, as this will give you a wide perspective on the situation at hand.  Blaming others is not an effective solution of getting away from the situation. Relax for a moment to calm your nerves. Tell yourself “This is the situation at hand. Now, what is the best thing that I can do to resolve the circumstances?” Doing this can actually help you come up with a solution to the problem without having to blame others.  Keep In Mind that You Can Only Grow if You Accept the Feedback of Other People  Learning where you made wrong choices is the only way you can develop and improve as a person. You will not observe progress in life if you love yourself unconditionally. You must learn the capacity to respond to the feedback that life has given to you, free from any distorting effects.  There is no shame in admitting your faults and blaming yourself, instead of faulting others for the mistakes you have made. In fact, it shows courage. It means that you are brave enough to face the consequences of the actions you have made. It can show the real strength of your character.  Learn the Habit of Admitting Your Mistakes  What is your reaction when things go wrong? Do you find yourself feeling worked up or angry? Do you feel shocked? Do you immediately blame other people for your mistakes? If you always dish out the fault to others to escape your responsibility, you will become a negative person. As well, you will get used to this bad habit and this habit will be the cause of your sufferings over time.  But, it doesn’t mean that you have to be quick to blame yourself. Let a moment pass before you admit to your family, your partner, or co-workers your mistakes. They will understand you and respect you for doing so.  Forget Faulting Others and Focus on the Solution  If people feel that you blame them unreasonably and unfairly, they will resent you and a time will come that they will hate you. This can result in conflicts between you and your partner, colleagues, or business partner. Tell them that things have already happened and you need to focus on how to make things better.